SoCS – Messy Buns

I tried to talk myself out of writing about the first thing that came to mind, but then I decided it just wasn’t worth it. I was thinking it wouldn’t make for very interesting reading, but who knows?  Maybe the subject could use a bit more talking about.  Although, that makes it seem like it’s somehow important, and it just isn’t.

As many of you who have been with me almost from the beginning now, I shaved my head once upon a time to support my sister who was going through breast cancer.  It was scary and wonderful and all sorts of things all wrapped on in a package that left me without hair for a few months and lots of months with some pretty awful hairstyles while I grew it back in.  As drastic as shaving my head was, it wasn’t the first time in my life that I whacked my hair off.  In high school, I chopped it all off because I fell in love with Demi Moore’s hair in the movie Ghost, and I rocked that style for quite a while.

I would say my life has been pretty evenly spent in long hair and short hair.  It’s pretty funny to me, though, that when it is long, most of the time it is up in a bun or a pony tail or somehow not just hanging all over the place.  It can be rather annoying, and for people with thick hair like me, it can be heavy!

I sort of miss throwing my hair up in a messy bun.  I’ve been thinking lately that maybe I’ll grow it out again.  I’ve started on this path many times since I shaved it.  My profile picture on my blog is probably the longest I’ve let it grow since then and it just didn’t last very long.  Inevitably, I get to a point where I hate it and I chop it all off again.  One thing I am for sure going to keep doing is the under-shave.  I just have too much hair to let it all grow out.  It does make me wonder how a messy bun will look, though, with some of my head shaved.  At this point, I don’t really think I have a choice.

I like that some sort of shaved head is starting to become more mainstream.  I think we all need to realize that as much as we think our hair defines us, it really doesn’t.  It’s not like a haircut is permanent.  Hair grows back!  So, if you’re thinking about doing something crazy for summer, I’d say jump right in.  It’s all sorts of fun and crazy in here!

Stream of Consciousness Saturday  is hosted by Linda G Hill. Today’s prompt is “bun.” Use it any way you’d like. Enjoy!



SoCS – Enthusiastic Hair Adventures

I have had a love-hate relationship with my hair for as long as I can remember. It began in early childhood when I was teased for the color. I’m not sure I will ever really love carrots because that word was used to torment me so much. It’s amazing how much importance we give to hair, but it honestly has so much to do with how we see ourselves.

I didn’t realize the full significance until I shaved my head. I also didn’t realize that by doing that, I would never be the same again. I’m not happy for the reason I shaved my head, but I am happy I made the decision to do it. It helped me realize how little hair defines who you are and has given me the nerve (or balls, depending on who you’re talking to) to explore new and different styles.

This has good and bad moments. I am currently six weeks into a hair cut that I have hated. It is finally working itself into something I am much happier with, but the first two weeks after I did it, I almost went back in and shaved it all off.

I’m realizing that some hair just won’t do what other hair does. I have really thick hair, so it doesn’t want to do the cute spiky thing, nor is it thin enough to lay down in a curly, cute way – oh yeah, and no curls either.

I also received less than enthused comments from my family. I don’t trust my boys because they’ll say whatever I want to hear right now, but the boyfriend didn’t like it and my sister-in-law’s reaction was “it’s different.” Haha, not what you want to hear when you plunge into new and uncharted territory with your hair.

Today, I am taking another leap into hair adventures. I am going to dye my gray away. Having it this short made me realize that I have too much gray to ignore and it doesn’t blend nicely and look good. It makes the color look washed out and there’s a particularly pesky batch right in front that will not hide anymore no matter how much I try tucking it behind other, colored strands.

I have to apologize to my mother, though. I once told her I would never dye my hair, but I did it at a time when getting older and turning gray weren’t even a thing in my head, so it was an easy promise to make.

I’m excited to venture into new territory and won’t be surprised if I throw all caution to the wind and get really funky with it. I’m just hoping it won’t affect the current job or any future employers I might be looking into. You might say I am enthusiastically jumping into uncharted territory and am excited to see the results.

My biggest fear is to have that old lady look and if I can dodge that in any way by dying my hair or cutting it, or shaving most of it off, I will happily, enthusiastically jump right in.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday is hosted by Linda G. Hill. “Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “enthuse.”  Add a prefix or suffix to it or leave it as it is and go to town with it! Enjoy!” Please feel free to click the link and join in the fun.


The Top 3 Reasons I Cut My Hair

As many of you will recall from this blog post, I went bald a few years back in order to show my sister she wasn’t alone in her fight for cancer. I experienced a great many emotions and had to battle many different ideas, especially the idea that somehow my hair defined me as a person. It was all worth it, though, because I could see how much it meant to my sister.

Last weekend, I decided to chop off most of my hair. Besides the bald event, I have done it once before when I was in high school and I ended up wearing it really short for a few years. Now I’m finally back to the short hair look, maybe for good.

I didn’t receive half as many strange comments and looks this time as I did when I went bald, but I did receive one comment that made me think. I was in the elevator at work with our receptionist. She’s an older lady and I’ve sat with her to cross-train a few times and we’ve chatted. So I know she’s had a hard life but I also know she’s a strong lady and doesn’t seem bitter at all considering some of the things she’s been through. But as we were going down the elevator she asked me, “Did you cut it because you can’t be bothered or because you were trying to get back at someone? I once got a tattoo because I was mad at my husband.”

Even though I know this is a pretty common occurrence, I suppose I always assumed that people grew out of this idea that somehow we have to get back at someone else by finally succumbing to that thing we have always wanted to do but know they’ll hate it so we don’t actually do it until that moment when we we are upset and want to show them who we really are! It’s not that I haven’t done something similar to this in the past, because I have. It’s just that I’ve moved past it and feel that I no longer need to prove anything to anyone. The people we are with and who love us should be the most accepting of things we want to do with our own bodies, including cutting our hair or getting a tattoo.

Here are the top three reasons why I cut my hair:

  1. I can’t be bothered. Short hair is super simple and easy and takes me less than five minutes.
  2. My boyfriend loves my short hair. He kept telling me I looked sexy in short hair, but I thought I wanted it long again after doing the bald thing and having it short for so long. Turns out, I was wrong.
  3. I actually like the way I look in short hair.

I can tell you that none of my reasons had anything to do with gender and as much as my boyfriend likes my short hair, if I’d wanted to keep it long, I would have.

Which brings me to the thing that really bothers me about hair and these meanings we’ve all attached to it. Why is it that the length of my hair tells someone how feminine I am? Why is it that short hair is associated with being gay (for women, anyway)? Why is it that men somehow aren’t manly when they have long hair?

It’s just hair! It will grow back or it can be chopped off in a matter of seconds. Who cares?

I get that it can be pivotal in how we present ourselves, but why attach so much judgment to it? It used to be that people with mo-hawks and color in their hair were stereo-typed as depressed punk rockers who were looking for attention. My daughter decided to put dreadlocks in her hair a few years ago and she received many negative comments. People assumed she was a stoner and a drop-out.

I actually love the freedom of those people who have dared to step outside of societal norms, for whatever reason, to just be different. I don’t know why we have to punish them for their decisions. I don’t know why this idea exists that it’s not okay to be bald.

I, for one, love that society seems to be moving on. It’s more common to see bright colors in people’s hair; tattoos are more common; hair doesn’t seem to be as much of a label anymore, but it’s still there, still an issue, especially when it’s associated with gender in any way.

My son has long hair and he loves it. I love it!

What I really want to say is, do what you love. Be who you want to be. Stop worrying so much about the people around you and this ridiculous “societal norm” that doesn’t mean anything, or at least, it shouldn’t.

It’s just hair, people. Not only that, it’s a living, growing thing. It will grow back! Or, it won’t..

Either way, embrace it and stop judging others who have embraced their hair in whatever length or style they choose to wear it.

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My son has longer hair than me!