SoCS – The Project

I had this moment of clarity today and it spurred me into action.  The action didn’t last long because life happened today, as it tends to do, but I feel like I have a good direction.  I’ve been thinking about writing a lot lately, most likely because it hasn’t really been happening, and I decided that I was just going to do it.  I decided to move my desk downstairs and just get to work.

I’d decided to start posting on the blog more and writing short stories again, but I realized that what I really want to do is finish that project that I started oh so many years ago.  I realize that I am the only thing standing in the way and all it takes is dedication to the process.  Where my desk is or how busy I am at work are only excuses, really.

It’s crazy to me how different I can be when I’m not writing.  My dreams are a whole lot more dark and I feel a heaviness all the time that doesn’t seem to be there when I’m writing more often.  I’m also realizing that the ideas and the thoughts don’t flow as easily.

I suppose it’s just like any muscle.  When you don’t use it, it sort of lays dormant and either finds it’s own way to express itself (dreams) or it just slowly fades.  Perhaps I’m being overly dramatic.  Maybe it doesn’t fade at all… I’m hoping it’s just like riding a bike and I can just jump into it full steam ahead and I can write my little heart out.

It’s probably going to be crap, but I’d rather write something than always thinking about writing and coming up with a million excuses why I just can’t do it.

I still want to post more here on the ‘ol blog, but perhaps I should spend my energy on my project rather than short stories that could be bigger ideas but I never allow them to go anywhere because I still have my heart set on that other thing that’s just sitting there.  So, I’m thinking this is a good first start – stream of conscious writing to get myself warmed up.  Many of my posts going forward might be like that, but I’m thinking that’s okay.

Does anyone else get scared thinking about writing a whole big story??  I’ve never done it before so it seems like this huge daunting task…   I suppose I’m nothing if not realistic.

Happy Saturday everyone; and Happy Writing!!

Stream of Consciousness Saturday is hosted by Linda G Hill. Today’s prompt is “project”.



10 thoughts on “SoCS – The Project

  1. I can definitely relate to this! I love how I feel when I’m writing, yet I haven’t even looked at my blog in almost two weeks. Good for you for moving downstairs!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am so empathising with your writing struggles but for completely different reasons. My husband writes fiction. He is extremely talented but lacks the confidence that the rest of us have in him. We are in a writer’s group and they all LOVE his work. When he doesn’t finish a book (there are three of ’em now) they get frantic! I, on the other hand, cannot even imagine how you all come up with stories. My brain doesn’t work that way…at all! I write non-fiction and my struggle is how to make true stories interesting enough for anyone to read.

    I love how you write Helen. Maybe all you need is some cheerleaders! (Or a writer’s group that will bitch a lot if you don’t write!!) smiley face and hugs

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’ve been wondering about the writing group. I might need to look into one here. I have always been someone who produces better under a deadline or some sort of accountability to someone or something other than myself. Thanks for the motivation. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I know what you mean Helen. I started a project once, for National Novel Writing Month, and I wrote thousands and thousands of words of a novel I’d had the idea for for years. After the month though I stopped writing it and that was four years ago now. I wonder if I will ever pick it back up again. I have so much I want to write and when I don’t I feel that same heaviness you speak of. Good luck to us both. I’d like to see what you have in mind.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I am so glad that you are getting excited about writing your story you started long ago. Good luck and enjoy the experience. Hopefully it will be a strength for you.

    Liked by 1 person

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