Mindful Monday – Getting my butt in gear

Do you ever feel like your body has betrayed you?  I’m feeling that way a lot lately… but even as I think that thought, I realize I’m whining when there are people who have serious medical issues that keep them from doing things they love or living the kind of life they would have wanted.  If I put it in that context, I really don’t have any excuses.

I finally realized just a few minutes ago that the reason I’ve gained so much weight in the past two years is probably because I built up a ton of muscle and then just stopped exercising.  Muscle turns to fat, or at least, I believe it does.  I’ve stopped a pretty hefty exercise routine twice now and both times, I gained weight.  I think my body is just sick of my waffling… I know I am.

April 23rd was the last day I ran and I did a 5K with my son.  However, my hip hurt so bad by the time I finished, that I actually limped across the finish line.  I decided it wasn’t worth it if I was going to be in constant pain.  So, I got depressed and quit doing all exercise.  I saw a doctor, who referred me to physical therapy.  (Between you and me, I only went once and cancelled my second appointment.  It hurt!)

I’ve been through the most extreme ups and downs in the past month.  I’m not happy.  I’m gaining weight and I feel like there’s no way out because all the things I love to do are things that hurt my hip.

Saturday, I decided I had to make a change for my own sanity.  I’m not going to jump into any kind of heavy lifting or running/walking.  I’ve decided to take it slow.  My goals this week are to take the stairs at work, walk for a half hour at lunch and eat smaller portions with every meal.  I know that sounds really small, and maybe I’m fooling myself; but I have to start somewhere.  I have to know that I’m taking steps toward a healthier me.

I think I’ve decided running isn’t something my body wants to do, but that could change.  Right now, I’m just going to take it a day at a time and see where it takes me.  I think the one thing I am realizing is that maybe I will just have to deal with pain (unless, of course, I pull my head out and decide to finish physical therapy…)

I stepped on the scale today, just so I could gauge any progress I might have in the weeks to come, and it was humbling.  I knew it, but seeing the reality in those three numbers was depressing.

I know this was more of a “getting my butt in gear” post, rather than an inspiring one, but I think it helped me to write it down.  So, thanks for “listening”.  I hope your mindful living is going well!


Bee at A Spirit of Healing is currently hosting Mindful Monday while Colleen at Silver Threading is away.

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17 thoughts on “Mindful Monday – Getting my butt in gear

  1. I’m with you. These past few months have been … relaxed … for me too. I’m starting to feel it in my ankles when I get out of bed in the morning, which is a sign that I need to get off my butt more. It’s true though – slow and steady is the best way. Doing too much at once causes setbacks. Never a good thing.
    Take it easy but keep going. I know you can do it, Helen! Patience is the hardest thing to overcome sometimes!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I agree with Linda. When you have been doing it and you leave it for a while, guilt also plays a very big part. Slow and steady makes a lot of difference. In time, you will also be able to run. Especially with exercises our bodies knows best. If you can endure a little pain, physical therapy actually would help you a lot in the long run. I know it did for me. And in time you will know what are the triggers and how to avoid or work around it.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Moderation is key I find as I get older. I stopped running years ago when everything ached afterwards- moderate walking or just walking is good for me. I use the app Map My Walk to see how far I’ve gone-keeping track makes it more fun somehow.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Make a plan, a small goal and reward yourself when you reach it. Say, walk every day for two weeks and then reward yourself with those shoes you’ve had your eye on. And don’t beat yourself up when you don’t complete your goal. Just start over.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Thanks for a great post. Yes Physical Therapy hurts. You just need to allow the person to help those
    muscles to heal. It is not easy keeping weight off. Look at me. I have done weight watchers 4 times and I stop eating right and exercising and it all comes back on again. Good luck on your plan. Don’t give up.
    Love you!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Do you know what the actual problem is with your hip? I had problems with my feet and my hip and I got insoles for my work shoes which makes a whole lot of difference. My problem is that my shin which I broke when I was 12 didn’t grow back into the right position. It never bothered me before but last year it got really painful. Since I have the insoles it is a lot better.

    However, I agree with Linda: Go it slow. Exercise won’t run away lol and I should know. Just made it to get my 1/2 hour a day walk in which doesn’t really make a difference in terms of loosing weight. There is probably only one way for me: eat less :-). Take good care of yourself. And I know you will find the right balance.

    Liked by 1 person

    • He said that my hips have too much movement when I walk and he assumed that happened when I ran. It’s a muscle issue. My butt muscles aren’t strong enough so the other one that’s connected all the way down the thigh overcompensates. At least, that’s how I understood what he said.

      I’m planning to take things slowly; and I’ve started on an eating plan. I just need something I can sustain long term. But I’ll get there.

      Thanks, Bee!

      Like

  7. Pingback: Mindful Monday/Healthy Living ~ Bugger That! (Sorry for my bad language) | Just Fooling Around With Bee or The Bee Writes...

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